off her game

"off balance" by Dean Farrell

I go through these periods of time in my life every so often where I am off-kilter: I don't seem to be communicating properly, I get behind at home and at work; just out of whack. It doesn't happen regularly, but when it does, it can last for 4-6 weeks.

Now is my really busy time at work: First Communions, Confirmations, Easter (not necessarily in that order), baseball, end-of-school stuff with the kids. I am in this off-kilter place right now (started 2 weeks ago) and it's not really good timing. I just can't afford to be a beat behind and feeling like all of my nerves are exposed at this time of year.

What also happens when I am here in Sideways Land (need to come up with a better name for that) is that I have a much lower tolerance for foolishness and for other people in general. From those I work with to my children, I am much more peevish and prone to snapping, like an irritated turtle.

Where I feel it most is in my daily conversations with my husband. I tend to take things extra personally when I am in this place and I wonder, "What did he mean by that? What's he REALLY saying?" When, of course, Scott, like most other men, doesn't have an alternate meaning behind his words. He says what he means and he means what he says. Not much more than that.

So, what's a girl to do?

This girl is going to get back to the nationally-known weight loss program she was on. I've gained about 15 pounds since Christmas. I have had 4 cycles, and each time thought I was pregnant so I haven't been back. I've decided that even though we're not-not-trying to get pregnant anymore that it's just not as easy for me to conceive as it used to be. Maybe it just gets like that when you hit your mid 30's. And it's harder to take the weight off at my age anyways, so I'm getting back on that horse.

This girl is also going to start exercising daily again. I feel better when I'm moving around. I'm also going to get more sleep. I really need 8 hours and I've only been getting about 6. I'm also going to pray more regularly and truly make time for the Lord in my life.

And maybe I'll finally make that overdue appointment to get the stuff under the hood checked out.